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5 Secrets of Being a Great Gamer Boyfriend: A Guest Blog Post by SmartyFella & His SmartyGirlfriend

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Photo Credit: Gamer Couple by Gupto Tayo via Pinterest

5 Secrets of Being a Great Gamer Boyfriend

Photo Credit: Link via Kotaku

Being a gamer isn’t as easy as it might sound. How does any student have time to pour hours into a game when they have finals to think about or maybe an exam or quiz? The temptations to play are relentless. But it doesn’t end there! What about work? Not all gamers have the luxury of parents paying for school or scholarships. Sleep is important too but any gamer knows that’s on the bottom of the priority list. And finally, for all you gamers that have a significant other, your second player, your adventuring companion, and gaming pretty much seems impossible. You’re probably thinking, one thing is going to thrive and it’s either your guild or your girlfriend. I’m a huge gamer and my girlfriend isn’t but we have a very healthy relationship. Luckily for you, I have five secrets to being a great gamer boyfriend that will help your relationship level up and your gaming as well.

Secret #1

Photo Credit: Link and Zelda Cosplay via Cosplay Couture
Photo Credit: Topher Ellis and Gamer Friends Playing Ghost Recon

BE YOURSELF! If you absolutely love video games, don’t be afraid to show it. If you meet someone or are with someone, it’s important to know things about each other. Well, one of those things that they should know about you is that you like playing video games. Now, this doesn’t mean to explain all the secret of the water temple in The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time but make it known that you enjoy video games. Your girlfriend will like you for who you are and as long as you don’t come off as obsessive, I think we’re all good. Hiding your hobbies won’t help either. I don’t think any girlfriend would ever want to find out that you skipped a date because you were sick but really had a raid with your guild. That’s a big no.

Secret #2

Photo Credit: Gamer Couple via Kotaku AU

Time management. I know what it’s like to want to spend an entire weekend playing a new game that just came out that I’ve been waiting months for. Well, plan this stuff out. Don’t spring on your girlfriend that you’re not going to be able to call her for the entire weekend because you’ll be spending the next 72 hours sniping zombies from a rooftop. Plan accordingly and tell your girlfriend that you’re really excited about a game coming out and can’t wait to play it. Let her know plenty of time ahead that it’s coming out. Believe it or not, your girlfriend likes to see you happy and if sees your excitement will understand that you want to spend some time playing. And to even add to this, after showing how excited you are to play the game and saying how you want to spend hours playing it, this gives you the perfect opportunity to surprise her. Always take some time out of your gaming to give her attention. This doesn’t mean she comes second it just means when you’re not on a date with her or having couple time and you’re playing games, take a few moments to be cute with her or tell her that you love her.

Secret #3
Photo Credit: Gamer Valentine by Reservoir Media via Pinterest
Photo Credit: Topher Ellis and Friends
Photo Credit: Topher Ellis and Bethany Roy

Don’t force your hobby. Guys, we’re not all going to have a gamer girlfriend. So don’t think you can turn your NOT gamer girlfriend into your soon to be healer. If you have a girlfriend that’s into gaming, that’s great, however if she’s not a gamer, don’t force her to play. Don’t be sad if you don’t have a girlfriend that’s into gaming however be happy that’s she’s supportive of your gaming. She might not always care to watch or appreciate when you got the high score but deep down she’s happy that you’re happy. Don’t get down if you can’t convince her to learn all your favorite Poke’mon but take it for face value when your girlfriend spends 3 hours at a GameStop trying to figure out which Call of Duty you wanted and maintain trying to keep it a surprise.

Secret #4
Listening is important. I know better than anyone that it’s tough to pay attention when you’re at a really good part of the game and you just can’t look away. This is where listening and communication is important. Sometimes your girlfriend doesn’t understand why you can’t just “pause” the game or just quit. Don’t make it a habit either to say “Oh, sorry I wasn’t listening.” Or “Oops I wasn’t paying attention to what you were saying.” I know it’s tough but wording here is important. If you are really caught up in a game and you can’t pause or stop at that very second and she’s trying to talk to you, always make it known that you can’t. “Hey babe, I can’t pause it here can I have a few minutes?” or “Honey, may I finish this fight really quickly so I can give you my undivided attention? I’ll make sure I win for you.” Also pay attention to the situation, if it’s really important to her or she’s yelling at the top of her lungs, drop the game. Cut your losses because you might lose more than a few lives in this situation. Your girlfriend should always come first. Make sure she knows that.
Secret #5

Remember what gaming is to you. Whether you’re very competitive, play to have fun or just love winning, remember why you play in the first place. You’re probably wondering what this has to do with being a gamer boyfriend but it’s actually very important. Don’t use video games to escape reality or to get away from problems you might be having in your relationship. If you have a problem, take what you learn from playing video games and that doesn’t mean that you can overcome any number of obstacles with a sufficient amount of quarters. You always want to progress in the stories of the games and have to level up, train, work at it and then overcome the obstacle. Relate that to a relationship with your girlfriend. It takes work, time and dedication to make a relationship work. If gaming is the only thing you’re good at, even you can have a healthy relationship and be a great boyfriend. Be your girlfriend’s shining knight in armor. Gamer girl or not, I don’t know any girl that wouldn’t want a boyfriend that would fight for her.

Here are five things my girlfriend said about me and what it means to her that I’m a hardcore gamer.
Photo Credit: Chibi Zelda by U R Geek via Pinterest

1.       It engages the kid in you =) which I love.

2.      Never giving up, I know in your games you always like a challenge and want to win.. I think that translates to real life as well. I love how determined you are to “win” and excel at life.. btw! You’re amazing at it!! Hehe.
3.        You prove not all gamers spend EVERY second gaming! You have a very good balance in your life =D you love gaming but also make time for school, multiple jobs, church, and we always get quality time together =) even if some new game comes out.
4.       You’re cute when you’re all into a game 😉 I hope that counts hehe.
Photo Credit: Topher Ellis & Bethany Roy a.k.a. “Tophany”

5.       Helping others. I know you get to destroy people in your games lol, but there’s always a hero, right? The good guys… you’ve told me before how you sorta got a “hero complex” from gaming? Well I see that Baby! I Think you were born with it =) But gaming I believe had helped develop that trait even more. You’re my hero love! <3

Guest Blogger Bios

My name is Christopher Ellis however I like to go by the nickname Topher. I study Computer Science at the University of South Florida and am a College Representative for Ubisoft. I highly enjoy a great RPG Video Game that I can spend hours upon hours playing and just lose myself it’s the story. You can follow my on Facebook Page www.facebook.com/UbisoftatUSFand on Twitter @Ubirep4USF.

My name is Bethany Roy and Jesus Christ is my passion. I hope to one day travel across the world to spread the word of Jesus. I enjoy being active and running great distances. I’m not a gamer however my boyfriend is enough of a gamer for the both of us.

Fun little fact about us: Our friends like to refer to both of us as “Tophany” instead of addressing us both individually. 

Valentine’s Day 2013 Special Features

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Photo Credit: Disney Hipster Princesses via Pinterest

Ready for some Valentine’s Day fun? Check out SmartyFella’s Convince Me You’re Desperate. Seeking some serious career tips to give your embolden your heart? Take a look at Creative Director Brian Bacino’s advice: 5 Habits of the Successful New Hire.

Photo Credit: House of Turquoise

Here are 3 things I like this Valentine’s week that you might like also:
1. A Covert Guide to Getting Promoted by Forbes Jenna Goudreau
2. Men’s Humor on Twitter
3. Turquoise and Red Decor on House of Turquoise

Valentine’s Day Humor: How to Convince Me You’re Desperate

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Photo Credit: Ridiculous Cover of Mountain Roses via Pinterest

Valentine’s Day is only 4 days away. I’ve asked a special guest to blog for us today. Please welcome our Guest Blogger Anti-SmartyFella. Ponder his insights. Maybe you won’t feel so bad being a selective and single SmartyGirl this Thursday.

This isn’t the first time I’ve been approached on the subject of how women can score
a hot guy like myself, but that’s really not the main issue women really have. Getting
together with a guy is only step one, keeping things fun and continuously dating is
the real challenge. Frankly speaking, there are a few qualities which can make you
distinguish yourself from all the other girls that guys like me have dated and they will keep us happy and keep us from “straying.”

Photo Credit: Hilarious Cover of Sea Treasure via Pinterest

First: Don’t ask to be exclusive after the third date.

We all like to keep our options open; just because we’ve gone out a few times doesn’t
mean that I should have to “put all my eggs in one basket.” Also, this isn’t a question that
can really be said “no” to, so you’re just asking us to lie to you and, after that, cheat on
you. If that time comes, just remember that it’s not our fault; you just asked for too much too soon.

Photo Credit: Silly Cover of Unknown Romance Novel via Pinterest

Second: Don’t try to make me choose between spending time with you or my friends.

We need our Bros. It’s pretty simple, we need our space and our friends are the ones to
help us vent or cool off. If we need to spend a week straight of drinking or relaxing and
playing video games with our friends, you need to respect that. If you ask us to stay and
spend the evening with you, we probably will but our level of resentment will increase.

Third: Don’t ask me where I’ve been every night.

If I wanted to date your mother, I would have asked her out. One of the most annoying
things you can do in a relationship is interrogate us. If we wanted you to know our
whereabouts at all times, we’d let you put a chip in our heads. When you find out that we
didn’t tell you that we were out with a female friend, it doesn’t mean we were cheating
on you, it just means we didn’t think you would take it very well and so decided not to

tell you about it.

Photo Credit: Goofy Cover of The Norse King’s Daughter via Pinterest

Fourth: Don’t ask me to state the obvious

Guys don’t like to say things like “I love you” in the middle of eating take out while
watching “The Walking Dead” on TV. If we’ve said it once, then we expect you to
understand that our feelings won’t change until we say otherwise. Questions like “Do you
still love me?” are annoying because you are asking for reassurance and a self-esteem
boost, but also because you’re interrupting whatever it was we were doing. That sort of
question brings the night to a screeching halt as the rest of the evening is likely going to
be spent assessing the relationship (as that can’t just be brushed off with a “sure, babe” without consequences).

Photo Credit: Dignified Cover of HeartMate via Pinterest

Fifth: Don’t start talking about “our future.”

This is the most important “Don’t” of all. The idea of settling down and kids is a scary
one to have early in a relationship. This should only be brought up after two to three
years of dating…maybe after moving in with each other. If brought up any earlier, you will automatically be labeled a clinger and your calls will go unanswered for a brief period of time.

Photo Credit: Super Cover of Stardust Dreams via Pinterest

Well, there you have it; these are the five cardinal sins of dating a hot guy. The key
message I am trying to get through to you ladies out there is that the main problem with
most relationships is too much communication. The more you feel the need to talk, the
more you push your man away. I hope this guide will have saved enough couples in time for Valentine’s Day!

Anti-SmartyFella is brought to you by SmartyFellas
Meet the SmartyFellas: The New Contributors to SmartyGirl for the male perspective on life, work and relationships.

Black History Month at the Children’s Creativity Museum: SF for Kids and Successful Business Women

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Today was jeans-day for me rather than my usual mod tights and corporate office wear. For me a ride on a vintage Northern California carousel never goes out of style.

It was a fortunate turn of events that the ticket-seller explained that tickets for the ride, purchased by credit card, are sold inside the Children’s Creativity Museum.

Photo Credit: Renee Marchol at Children’s Creativity Museum SF for Kids
Photo Credit: Renee Marchol San Francisco Tourist Spots Children’s Creativity Museum iPad Toadstools 


Photo Credit: The Children’s Creativity Museum Animation Studio Clay Animation using iStopMotion

A dazzling display of cloud mobiles, red and white toadstools outfitted with iPads and dream catcher workshops tantalized me from the lobby. How did the museum facilitate interactive DIY studio workshops in this riveting playland of spellbinding sight, sound, and touch? My painted carousel camel would have to be patient for its rider. 

Rani, the Youth Program Director, greeted me. His black ponytail swished happily as he answered my questions about the Dreamcatcher Station. The Dreamcatchers here were reed hoops, neon pink license plate frames, and paper plates webbed with red and pink yarn. Parents in black-zippered knee boots and black berets sat on low bright pine tables with their preschoolers winding yarn.

Then my guide, led me to the music station where two sisters stood in front of a green screen while holding microphones. The volunteer sat at the sound and video editing board to record the sweetest rendition of Old Macdonald’s Farm. Proud papas wearing baby slings while holding their toddlers’ hands strolled by happily.

Photo Credit: The Children’s Creativity Museum Amy photographed me in front of the Music Room Green Screen

Rani introduced me to Fatimah Guienze and Leila, a mother-daughter team, presenting a special workshop for Black History Month’s African American Innovations inspired by Madam C.J. Walker. Madam C.J. Walker was one of the first successful business women to create haircare and skincare products out of natural ingredients for African Americans. She was also the first American woman self-made millionaire. No doubt, a SmartyGirlLeader!

Photo Credit: LEAP Architecture Teaching Artists Fatimah Guienza

Fatimah teaches architecture twice a week elsewhere but she loves to volunteer here at the Children’s Creativity Museum because she likes to share what she has learned from her mother. Fatimah and Leila were teaching adults and children how to make their own natural skincare products with castor oil, superfine sea salt, dried French lavendar, essential oil of bergamot, and fresh lemon zest, and shea butter. Fatimah hosted the station to blend ingredients and her mother hosted another station to decorate the jars of the finished product: either a reusable flip top plastic jar or a half-sized mason jar.

Homemade Sea Salt Scrub with Lemon Zest and Bergamot Oil

1/3 cup Extra-fine sea salt
1/3 cup Castor oil or more
Fresh lemon zest (a sprinkle)
6 drops of essential Bergamot oil

First pour the sea salt into the container such as a clean mason jar. Second pour the castor oil. Third stir these together in with a wooden tongue depressor (i.e. clean popsicle stick). Make sure you stir well so that all the salt joins the castor oil party. You may use a 1:1 ratio of castor oil and sea salt if using the scrub on your body.

Photo Credit: The Children’s Creativity Museum Mother and Child Painting by a junior artist

Use more oil for a more gentle exfoliation if you plan on using the homemade scrub on your face. To use: wash your face and body with your usual natural soap. Rinse. Apply the salt scrub onto your skin. Use tiny gentle circling motions to scrub. Rinse with lukewarm water. You’ll feel moisturized and your soul will feel nourished!

Leila spoke about her success as a working mother and what she teaches her children. I listened while I decorated my jar of homemade sea salt scrub with bergamot (like Earl Grey Tea) with lemon zest. Leila’s welcoming voice and attractive station drew many participants. labels,

scrapbooking paper cut with pinking shears, puffy decals such as green alligators and purple petals. My favorites were the  inspiring stickers that included “You are my sunshine”.

Photo Credit: Renee Marchol Salt Srub for my Associate Editor Erica for “Friendship Day”

Carrying the mason jar of salt scrub I made for my Associate Editor, Erica, I head off to the Animation Studio. Parents and kids are provided with all the tech help, colored clay, workstations and bendy-wire they want by the attentive Creative Inspiration Through Youth C.I.T.Y. Teen volunteers. The software makes it easy for you to record stop motion frame-by-frame without technical training. The camera captures the still clay form, then you are free to change the clay shape. The software creates a shadow where the clay figure was. This way you have a point of reference. Then the frames are played together so you can see animation! Fast-results make the experience feel magical. The volunteers will email you the video file when you are done.

Another station was the perfect height for parents to create a secret animated message for their children. The monitors for the finished 2D animation were kid-height. One dad animated the spelling of his daughter’s name. A mom created a poem for her kid.

I shook hands with the wonderful staff at The Children’s Museum. I walked next door to the glass topped carousel and handed the operator my sunshine yellow ticket. As I rode my carousel camel, I listened to the soft calliope music at the San Francisco tourist spot and felt pure joy. Imagine the fun you’ll have when you visit!